Sunday, January 11, 2009

The Day My Life Ended...

I sit here on Sunday night writing this. Frustrated that I can do nothing but pray for my wife. The love of my life, my everything. I've been falling for 3 days and have yet to find the bottom.


Buffy had been sick with what we thought was the flu for 3 days. She was running a fever and had a headache, but we managed with some tylenol. Not having insurance and living day to day made us ride out most illnesses. Shes only 39. And then Friday...


Friday morning I went to wake her and she didn't respond. We rolled her and shook her and her eyes would open but she just wasnt there... She mumbled "bathroom" and slipped away again. Her fever was high, I dont think she'd taken the tylenol that I had laid out for her. I'd been working late and got home on time the night before and went to bed on the couch to let her have the bed. That was around 8:30 or 9. I remember going to the bathroom around 12 or 1 and speaking to her, about what I cant remember. But at 5 when I got up I went to see how she felt I was crushed...


Me and my daughter loaded her into the car by some miracle and got her to the emergency down the street. My mind raced as the staff at Mercy SW took her right in. I filled out papers and made some phone calls while me and the kids sat in the waiting room. It was obvious that something was bad wrong. We got there at 6:08.


We sat huddled together wile we waited for something from the staff. They had whisked her away while I was filling out the sheet. Clay, the security guard, new that something was wrong and got her back there instantly.


My parents arrived around 7 and my mom took the kids for breakfast and me and my dad waited for some news.


Not till after 8 did I finally get to talk to Nancy, one of the great ER nurses there. She took me back and sat me down to explain what was happening. They had her intubated and sedated and stabilized. Her temperature was 105 and her heart rate was 168. The CT scan showed bi-lateral pneumonia, and possible brain damage...


I fell. Not a fall to the floor but the eternal falling like someone has your very heart and soul in their grasp and they're holding it 6 feet away from you. They were still getting her back into the ICU so I couldnt see her yet so I went out side and I cried.


And I cried like I have never cried before. And I sobbed and I prayed and I sobbed and I prayed, then I cried some more.


She Is My World. My life. My everything. The reason I get up, the very reason I breath. The mother to our children. My all. My soul. Why her.... Why.... I've got to stop now as I'm crying too bad to continue....


She needs prayer. Please....

8 comments:

Mr_Slugo said...

Our family has yours in our prayers ....I believe my God answers prayer

[1R]Mage said...

Prayers are in the midst Rob. I'll keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers.

Birdiebo said...

I know of your wife through deviantart, and I've always injoyed her amazing art. My prayers are with you and your family.

Anonymous said...

I know of your wife through Randy Kintz (Rantz) over at Deviantart.

Your family will be in my prayers.

hjb said...

I watch your wife on deviantart, and I followed a link to this journal over DA as well. I just cried then, reading your journal. My wishes, prayers and heart go to her. I know you guys will get through this. Hold strong.
<3

Anonymous said...

I read about your wife on DeviantArt...
I saw some of her work, and she is amazing...

i hope she recovers soon....
We'll be praying

Anonymous said...

I heard about this through Deviant Art, and I'll pray for you and your family as well. I'm sorry to hear something as tragic as this, and I really hope and feel everything will be okay in the end. Stay strong.

Anonymous said...

I heard about you through Deviantart, and I will keep her and your family in my prayers. God does hear us and answer them. My heart is with you all. God bless you.